


Blind Date

by WrathoftheStag



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Dad Jokes, Inspired by an Instagram post, It doesn't go so well, M/M, Shy Jack, awkward dinners, but then it does, jack and bitty have a blind date, set up by holster and ransom, skeptical bitty, wish you weren't so effin awkward bud
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:22:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26271808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WrathoftheStag/pseuds/WrathoftheStag
Summary: Jack and Bitty have a blind date.  It doesn't go so well, but then it does.  Now with more Dad Jokes!
Relationships: Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann
Comments: 40
Kudos: 262





	Blind Date

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [an Instagram story](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d3592da701ce8a67325f4ceea4c4e8b2/e22d221df1ca6cfe-58/s500x750/dbc7c31dda5c918304bd22720a8fb80d6f6ca4f3.jpg)...

Bitty didn’t care how gorgeous this guy was; he had to get out of there. Quick style.

There was painful, and then there was _Painful_. And this blind date was definitely worth the capital letter.

When Jack Zimmermann showed up at the restaurant that evening, Bitty felt his jaw drop. Now, Ransom and Holster told him Jack was good looking, and boy, they did not exaggerate. 

Bitty knew he was a hockey player, but they had also told him he was well-read, a total gentleman who enjoyed sports (obviously), food, and would be a perfect match for Bitty. But as he sat in front of Jack Zimmermann, he realized he’d had a better time when he got his wisdom teeth pulled two summers ago.

“So, do you like traveling for work? It must be so exciting, seeing all those cities,” Bitty said as he sat in front of the most stoic and bland man alive.

Jack was aloof, not much of a talker, and hardly looked at Bitty the entire night. And if he glanced toward Bitty’s way, he looked as though he had just swallowed a bee. 

“I don’t get to sightsee,” he said then continued to tuck into his steak quietly. “I’m there for a game, in and out.”

Bitty watched him eat quietly for a beat.

“I see.”

He had been fixed up by Ransom and Holster because their friend, Shitty, had a friend who would be “’swawesomely perfect” for him. 

Now Bitty had had the worst dry spell, so he thought he would actually give it a go. How bad could it be? But as he sat across the most painful dinner date he’d had in a while, he was now missing shoe barf dude from Winter Screw all those years ago back at Samwell.

He could almost hear Holster’s voice now.

“Bitty, my man, it will be fun! I met Jack a couple of times, and Shitty swears by him. That’s the gold seal of approval, dude. He’s perfect for you!”

“And he’s a total smokeshow,” Ransom added. “An ass that won’t quit.”

“Guys, I just… remember the last time you set me up with someone?”

Holster pinched the bridge of his nose.

“You’re still going on about that? Bitty, it’s been _eons_.”

Bitty felt smug in the knowledge that he could now hold two bad dates over Ransom and Holster’s heads. 

“So, did you always want to play in the NHL?” Bitty asked, trying to get some sort of conversation going. He didn’t know anything about Jack but figured hockey was a safe conversation starter.

“Yes,” Jack replied and briefly looked at the ceiling.

“And now you’re doing it. It’s great when childhood dreams easily come true. Your parents must be so proud,” Bitty said.

He noticed Jack stiffen, then nodded curtly. 

Bitty huffed a breath. Now what? What did he say? It had been over an hour of nods and monosyllabic answers. He was going to murderize Ransom and Holster. Well, they were consistent with the bad dates, he’d give them that much.

“Something wrong with your salmon?” Jack asked mid-chew.

“Oh, yeah, no, it’s good. Just taking a breather, you know,” Bitty said and began cutting it again.

“Make sure you finish it. Bittle, you need to eat more protein.”

Protein? What the what?

“Marty suggested this place,” Jack continued. He took a sip of his wine. “Said the ambiance was nice… you know, romantic?” 

Bitty quirked an eyebrow. Boy howdy, if Mr. Zimmermann thought there was even an ounce of romance in this evening, he sure wasn’t the sharpest knife in the kitchen drawer.

“He said this place had good desserts, so that sealed the deal since I know you love baking,” Jack said.

Dessert? Bless this boy’s heart. Bitty didn’t think he had it in him to sit through an entire dessert. 

“I’m sorry, Jack. I don’t think I’ll be able to have dessert even if they have one chock-full of protein. I have to get up early to take my cousin to the airport. You know how those five in the morning flights are.” 

Jack’s face fell slightly.

“Ah. Well, yeah,” Jack said as he looked off to the side. “That happens, I guess. Family. What are you going to do?”

Bitty offered him a watery smile.

“Anyway, I knew it,” Jack said.

“What?”

“That you wouldn’t be interested,” Jack said as he blushed deeply. “I told Shits and Ransom and Holster that you wouldn’t be. You’re so cute and outgoing--” 

Bitty was stunned. “What?”

“No, it’s fine. I totally get it,” Jack said as he held up his hands. “I know how I am, and it takes a while for me to open up and not act like a total robot.”

Then the waiter came.

“Do you wanna box for your leftovers?” he asked.

Jack looked at him and replied calmly, “No, but I’ll wrestle you for them.”

Bitty let out a snort as he dropped his fork.

The waiter gave Jack a puzzled look, then walked away with the plates.

Jack smirked and then took a sip of his water.

“Where did that come from?” Bitty asked.

“What?”

“That… that dad joke.”

“Oh, yeah,” Jack blushed again. “I’ve been told I have the worst taste in jokes. Dad jokes? No, how about underappreciated humor. That’s more accurate.”

Bitty smiled, which in turn made Jack smile, a smile Bitty hadn’t seen once throughout the date. 

“If you think that was funny, you should check out my improv act,” he replied with a straight face.

“Really?” Bitty asked. “You do improv?”

“Yes, I’m famous,” Jack replied plainly but Bitty could now tell he was joking. “Hey, Bittle. Do you know how to make holy water?”

Bitty put his fork down. “No, how?”

“You boil the hell out of it," Jack said, then grinned as Bitty giggled.

Well, now, there was definitely more to Mr. Jack Zimmermann than met the eye. It took Bitty a second to catch up, but then he realized that Jack was awkward, sure, but he was also just shy and thoughtful---he had picked that restaurant based on their dessert menu, after all. When the waiter came back with their leftovers, Jack cleared his throat. 

“So, euh, would you like to look at the dessert menu?” he asked shyly.

Bitty smiled, admiring Jack’s open, earnest expression. 

“Yeah… I would love to.”

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this during my lunch hour. Be kind! :D
> 
> All OMGCP characters belong to Ngozi Ukazu.
> 
> Come and say hi [on Tumblr](https://wrathofthestag.tumblr.com/post/628264104109490176/blind-date).


End file.
